Sunday, April 21, 2013

Another tragedy at Mitakihara, this time on the court

Another tragedy at Mitakihara, this time on the court

January 21, 2030

Season Report Posted: December 15, 2012 07:37 

No sooner had Mitakihara University come to terms with the demise of Magi quarterback Siri Illuminati that the Magi men's basketball team lost its captain...forever. Chuck "Big Shot" Parker, a 7-0, 260-pound senior center from Normal, Alabama, suffered a heart attack, collapsed on the court during a Big Sky conference game against Northern Arizona at Kirisame Pyramid and died on the spot.
Her mother, Annie Mae Parker, and sister, Fannie Mae Parker, were at the game, and were crying and screaming, slamming their heads on the court as if to bow toward Mecca, when they ran over to him, and the medics were trying to revive him.
"This university is cursed!" screamed Annie Mae in her Alabama drawl. "It's cursed I tells ya. My boy be dead down here! This university is so cursed!"
"My big brother is gone," said Fannie Mae, sobbing uncontrollably. "This university, it gone done and killed him! Like a dog!"
"I cannot begin to fathom what had just happened," said a terse Dr. Madoka Kyouno. "First Siri, now Big Shot. All these athletes are dying on the spot. They're not taking care of themselves. This is turning into one of the more difficult months in the history of Mitakihara University, and I am at a loss for words."
Dr. Rika Shiguma, who is the team doctor, for the football team, believes if a player has an underlying condition that is life-threatening, partaking in athletics is the roughhouse equivalent of a dance with death.
"Common sense has to prevail in this instance," Dr. Shiguma said. "If you have an underlying heart condition, you shouldn't play, plain and simple. A lot of players had to retire from sports because of their condition and the fact that they were risking a heart attack. This could have easily been prevented by simply not taking part.
"The players who play for us need to be cleared by our medical staff and pass a comprehensive fitness exam to ensure they are healthy enough to take part in NCAA competition. This is very, very sad day for the Mitakihara family."
A memorial service will be held tomorrow at Kirisame Pyramid. The game was cancelled and a victory was awarded to the Magi via forfeit.

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